never hit the press

Hi photo peeps -- it's been awhile. But I know you check in every so often, as I do too.

I've been at my job for almost five months now...crazy how time flies.

It has been hard for me to separate my own work vs. my job work. But from time to time I will find myself shooting just for me, even on the same roll as I am for my job.

I sometimes forget that the newspaper I work for doesn't want to see pain and loneliness. It wants to maintain its carefree, small-town feel, even though the city is growing larger and larger with a diverse population that is struggling to find its way.

And yet that's what I am most drawn to. The kid playing by himself. The man sitting on the curb under the weight of indescribable heat as cars whiz by and ignore him. The woman whom others look at condescendingly for scolding her child under her breath in a language unfamiliar to them.

I won't lie, though. Some shots I take do warm my heart. But most are rooted in childhood innocence...and once the smile or laugh fades all I feel is empty.

Clearly I need an income, but I also need to fulfillment. I want to make discoveries. I want to make a difference.

Do you?

Update

I hope everyone is doing well...Things have gone crazy directions here. I am so confused about my path in life...I am going to school for Criminal Justice right now, but also decided to try to become a youth minister at our church...Wow, what crazy ends of the spectrum...AND I believe I will be going to grad school next year... What I love, even with the craziness and indecisivness, is that I have found the passion to WANT to do all these things, and to experience them...I have come a long way in thinking from where I was my freshman year in college and I know that it all started by taking pictures and being yelled at by a certain Prof. my sophomore year. Can all of you say that now? Where are you all at in a small paragraph? What do you want to accomplish that also brings you joy and affirmation? While you all ponder that...Here is just some stuff I have been doing... It's good to be back on here again.