How many of us have felt this way lately? Probably not many of us from what I have been hearing from people...We know that the passion we all had last year is still there, but it has become so buried over the summer, and over decisions and conflict we encountered last semester (Shane leaving us). Our emotions were fucked with and we were pulled in every different directions when it came to stating our opinions and then put on a chopping block for our convictions...
I have come back to say (including saying it to myself)...Fuck that! We are artists...I truly believe that all of us are artists and no one can take that part away from us. No one can tell us that we do not create art. That is for us to say...We can lie and say we are, when we know we are not truly making art, just to give us the justification. However, as artists, we know the difference...we know the passion, the strength, the emotion that it truly means to be an artist. We also have made the decision to be in a funk...I was telling my teacher Sarah Dettweiler (aka: the female form of Shane) today about the time that Shane yelled at me so bad, that I went back to Sam Vanstraten's open arms and cried in the darkroom with Ben Morhac rubbing my back because they all heard him telling me I was making crap and was going to fail if I didn't pick it up my shit!!! That was also the day that changed my life... I think you can all think of the day that you were sparked to create art or at least a period of time...Wasn't it the best feeling in the world? I know it was for me...probably one of the best feelings I will ever be given in my lifetime, because it is mine and no one else will ever experience what I felt...I think we have all felt similar, but yet our feelings have all been unique and effected us in a different way...
It is our decision to get out of our funks! We have been making excuses for the past couple of months. We have all seen them on the blog. We're "uninspired", "not feeling it", "not having that spark." Guess what!? It's time to find it again...no excuses! Remember when we had projects due in a week, and we hadn't even shot yet!? Somehow we came out last year with outstanding work to be proud of...because we followed the infamous "process." Time to follow it again guys...I want to see new work up! I want to be inspired by my classmates/friends again!! I need you! You need me... Let's do it together...Let's get out of this fucking funk...Go out and shoot...You may shoot crap, but just shoot! That is how we are going to get the "spark" back, and that is the only way. It's not going to jump out of us and bite us in the ass! When has that EVER happened...It hasn't...
I am writing this for myself, along to all of you. I had a fantastic (emotional) meeting tonight with my teacher and I know I am so blessed to have her, and I hope you all to be able to meet her at some point. She is the bee's knees! I hope I can just spout out her inspiration to you guys and in our future meetings to help us all through not having our inspiring teacher here anymore...
I know that it is the hardest thing in the world to walk through that building and not have someone to stop and talk to when I am having a horrible day and need to cry about the fact that I will never have a future...Shane you are what got us here...We got ourselves to be artists, but you sparked it...I hope this will spark you as well. This is for you just as much as anyone else. We still need you, and I hope you still need us.
COME ON GUYS...Let's be artists again! Don't let our crappy department and teachings bring us down, or the work world take over our inspiration and our dedication...We are artists, bred to create art for ourselves and others...We are created to help, to lead by example and to teach others...We are made to inspire...
I am with a man I love...in stupid classes again (except for one)...have a job I love...Living day by day... Missing a great teacher...Enjoying a new teacher...Missing my mom...Enjoying my family...watching my friends grow around me...living with a best friend...
These are just a few things that inspire me everyday, but I don't open my eyes to that often. Some of them are new, some of them are old...But open your eyes and see what surrounds us...Go out and look at what surrounds us...Experience life, like you have... or new with new eyes and perspective.
That is all...That is my rant...That is my first passionate rant to pave the path to New Convictions...New Discoveries....New Places...New People...But with the same old "process."
CHEERS
Life beats down and crushes the soul and art reminds you that you have one. ~Stella Adler
4 comments:
Please inspire yourselves, each other. You'll do great things if you never give up reaching for dreams. Cheers to Mary (and Sam and Jacki before her) for doing what she can do to inspire herself and others.
I expect great things from you...all of you.
Wow! So this made my eyes well up a bit. All of it is SO true though, thanks for coming out and "saying," it. All that we have been feeling, but afraid to share openly, I suppose. It is particularly to feel that passion now that I don't have projects, etc. But I need to pursue with the same vigor as if I had something due everyday. Countdown to a particular grad school application is approximately 3 months, that's it. I needed to read this. I need these reminders and this community to keep me pushing.
Jacki et al. I create due dates for myself. And if I can't figure out what to do, I do one of those funky projects I've assigned you guys...I literally 'assign' it to myself. Sometimes I create completely new projects just to get me going. My current project (now almost 11 months old and still going strong) started out as a fear project! Empower yourselves!
I think that was part of it for me too.. I don't have projects anymore. I was having problems with not having direction, but I shouldn't be fed all the time about what I should do.. then I come up with work that doesn't feel entirely me. We need to do what we feel even if it means being vulnerable. I just posted a few shots I took early in the summer. But you're right, it's time to get out of the funk. I didn't want to be vulnerable before because I feel like whatever mood I'm in guides what I shoot. There's no shame in honesty. Thanks, I miss all of you very much.
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